i am a sophomore in high school who's struggling to stay on top of my grades. school has been especially hard since COVID, and even before then, it was a challenge for me to function. i have MDD, PTSD, ADHD, and Anxiety. what a lovely clusterfuck i have going on, right? :) i'm constantly emotionally and physically abused. my best isn't good enough for my mother. i have to always meet HER standards or else i'm just being "lazy and irresponsible". i'm trying my absolute hardest, but getting myself out of bed and dressed properly is a struggle in itself. i can barely handle the fuckton of work my teachers pile onto me daily, let alone focus enough to understand the lesson. i can feel my sanity and will to live slipping away with each passing day. i don't know how much longer i can handle being belittled and berated for every mistake i make. i've considered running away with my best friend several times, since our mothers are both EXTREMELY similar with their "parenting" methods. my mother claims i need her, but in reality i don't. i don't need her for jackshit. i feel like her puppet. she pulls the strings and makes me do things to compensate for whatever fuckups she's had in the past. sorry, but that has not one damn thing to do with me and i refuse to let you continue to control me as if i cannot make decisions on my own.

my parents are still abusing me and when i confront them they tell me to shut up, and when i ask to listen to music in the shower they yell at me and say no... plus they have taken me away from all my friends so i have no one to talk to,

So recently my parents have slapped me and yelled at me a lot because I had a phone that i wasn't supposed to have.It resulted in the police getting called my dad getting bite myself... I was in the children's home until November 3rd and i got home and everything went to shit. parents can hardly talk to me... So that brings me today.. i bought like 6 scrunchies and used my moms card. instead of asking me civilly she accused me right on the spot yes i did it. but she took out her anger by yelling and saying rude explicit stuff about me and how i need to be able to apologize after.. Little did the bitch know i was about to apologize but then she pulled getting her and my sister food and leaving me out so now I'm not so sorry.

I hate living with my parents. I hate my mother most importantly. she's a drunk. I'm 17 years old I'm turning 18 in a couple weeks. my mom came home today banging on the door to get beer and an ice chest. (ME) i had my headphones on, (im a college student) i had them on full blast because i want to focus i like music while i do my homework. but no she gets home yelling at me making fun of me AND MOST IMPORTANTLY IN FRONT OF MT FAMILY. ALL THEY DO IS LAUGH AT ME AND MAKE FUN OF ME. ALL I CAN DO I SUCK IT UP AND NOT SAY A THING. IT SUCKS TO SAY BUT IM GROWING UP HATING MY OWN MOM. ALL SHE DOES IS TALSK DOWN ON ME MAKES FUN OF ME. I CAN'T BE A NORMAL TEEN. YESTERDAY I WENT OUT WITH MY FRIENDS AND I CAME BACK CRYING CAUSE I DIDN'T KNOW HOW TO TALK OR BE NORMAL. I NEVER GO OUT I DONT TALK TO PEOPLE CAUSE OF MY FUCKING MOTHER. I DON'T KNOW HOW TO TALK TO BOYS. IM ALONE IN THIS FUCKING WORLD AND IM SICK OF IT WHEN I GET THE FUCK OUT OF THIS HOUSE IM GOING TO MAKE SURE I NEVER COME BACK. I DONT CARE.
THAT WAS MY DAILY VENT SENSE NO ON HEARS ME OUT IN THIS FUCKED UP WORLD.

i cant do work normally bc i can barely get out of bed in the morning :)))) I try my hardest but because my best isn't THE best in my fathers eyes he decides im not trying. he decides im just lazy and stupid so he punishes me. he calls me a failure, which only makes my mental state worse :)))))) i cant wait to get out of my current living situation and get some therapy lmao