Addiction to unhappiness and how to solve it | VentAllOut blog

Don’t we all love children? The main reason that we feel bliss when watching kids is that they are always happy, they see a small ant crawling by, that is enough for them to be happy. As we grow these happiness are hard to come by, our expectations increase, we don’t pay attention to tiny things and nothing is new to us. For some, they are bored being in the same situation that they forget how blessed their condition really is. For some happiness comes by easily but there are others who have to work hard to reach that happiness just like dieting and exercising. There are many addictions that we hear on a daily basis, addiction to drugs, alcoholism, workaholism. But there is another addiction that is hard to recognize but has the capacity to pave the way for bigger mental illnesses, that is, addiction to unhappiness. There might be different reasons for a person to be unhappy and be continuously be unhappy. It can be low self-esteem and confidence, so when something good happens we think that we are undeserving of it. Parenting a child to be excessively disciplined and with unrealistic expectations keeping the child away from healthy socializing can also lead to unhappiness in later years. Traumatic or negative experiences can also trigger it. Others think that being unhappy is a part of being practical. While others might be punishing themselves for some they have. People who finally have a chance to be happy fear the new feeling thinking it will create more disappointment or that happiness is just a ‘set up’. For others, unhappiness is a result of thinking too much of the worldly problems and crisis there are also people who might have other mental illnesses that might lead to unhappiness. This is a situation anyone can have during their lifetime, doing activities and invigorating the brain can be effective to some but for others, this might have reached the stage of ‘chronic unhappy syndrome’ which might need small counseling before it’s too late. Knowing the following symptoms can help us to evaluate whether we have this addiction to unhappiness.

·         Pessimism, dissatisfaction are common symptoms of this situation

·         They want control over their lives and they want to live a life without taking on changes because they fear that bringing changes will take away their control, it is for this reason many people don’t take new jobs even if it is very beneficial. What we should know is that we will never have control over our lives so we should do what we love and have no regrets.

·         Constantly compares themselves to others, even if they are living a content life they will look onto others life and be jealous of them. Maybe those people might be suffering greater hardships than us. The outer looks never matter. We should learn to be content with what we have and do our best.

·         They think that it is the shiny material possessions that create happiness and tries to fill the void in their hearts by buying things. They try to maintain their face among others through these possessions.

·         Socializing and trusting people are hard for them. They might also hold grudge against people to get away from responsibilities. Happy people might also not trust strangers but they will always keep open a possibility for them to win the trust. It is by socializing that we might find the best companions of our lives so give them a chance.

·         They don’t have resolve of their own and think that life is by default a disappointment this leads them to quit from their efforts to achieve something be it dreams or tasks because they fear disappointment even after trying. They also jump to conclusions when faced with adversities, that is, bad outcomes, and try to be safe by avoiding it.

·         They usually are selfish because they don’t trust others and think that only they themselves can achieve something but in most cases it is by working together and kindness that we achieve many things.

·         They fail to express gratitude for what they have. They take blessings for granted and only focus on the negatives.

·         They focus on small problems and hide bigger ones to keep away from criticisms and embarrassment because for them what others think matters more than their satisfaction.

·         Since they fear to work hard and face disappointment they usually don’t have goals in their lives and also fear learning new things because it brings change and these people fear change too.

·         For them material possession is happiness so they always worry about money even if they have enough and more.

It is proven that having a mentality of gratitude can help a lot because it triggers the same chemical as in shame, guilt, and worry. So be thankful for each day, give others a smile just for being there, it will chemically give the same sensation as worry.  We should accept our problems and face it rather than ignoring it, this is what we are doing when we are reading this because we are evaluating ourselves. When we are overwhelmed with the above listed or other anxieties take that adrenaline rush and draw goals using that excitement and work to achieve it. And mainly socialize and connect with people, drop the mistrusting attitude and give in to relationships. And know that life can never be controlled, but it can be enjoyed, give your best and satisfy your dreams and give the steering to the flow of life.


Nabeela Rasheed

Posted : 2 weeks ago

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