I'm blamed by my brother and my cousins of "You're just saying that because you're scared or you're going to be embarrassed," or whatnot, when really, I just don't want to do it. Or maybe, I see that this person only plays this single player game on a Nintendo switch, which was bought to play with the family. I talk about it and they say "You're just saying that because you don't play it." It sounds stupid, but sometimes i can hear them talking about be in the other room, insulting me, talking about how i'm just "whining." I already have depression. I'm already suicidal. Its all a secret. And sometimes, I get so frustrated and angry and sad that I'm not like them, that I just break down and start crying. And the worst part is, when they see, they just start shifting the blame. NO comforting me. NO apologizing. Sometimes, when they don't insult me, they just pretend I'm not real. It happened just now. It literally breaks be when I think to myself, "Why don't I just kill myself? Then I wouldn't have to deal with this."